Mom

I always knew she was a force of nature.

I always knew she was powerful, good, and true.

I took for granted how she painted a perfect picture of childhood for me - until I became a mom myself.

My mom gave me heart-shaped sandwiches in my lunch, watched every single sporting event, made dinner every night, smocked sweet little dresses for her 3 daughters, gardened, cleaned, volunteered for everything, and spent hours at the doctors, orthodontists, dentists, and sports therapist offices.

She may have looked graceful and lovely, but she was never afraid to stand in the mud to cheer us on. She didn't hesitate when confronted with bloody noses, scraped knees, or toes that bent in ways toes should never bend.

Mom's always been a tough chick.

She ages gracefully, fills her days with artistic and athletic pursuits, listens to phone call after phone call of random daughterly chit chat, and comes running at the sign of any emergency in the lives of anyone she knows.

I know if it came down to it, there's nothing Mom couldn't or wouldn't do.

To me - these videos are about my mom.

Christmas Cousins with a visit from "The Scowler"

My mom made these sweaters and dresses for all the cousins. Don't they look friggin' adorable?! These photos are like chocolate to me.

All the cousins:

Addison, Phoebe, Graesen, Aidan

Phoebe (aka "scowler") didn't like the way the photographer was flipping her hair to make them smile. Phoebe thought it was stupid. And weird. And downright freaky.

She made this face in every single group photo.

So, just to be fair, here is what she usually looks like:

Worlds' Cutest Kids?

Or am I just biased?

Rest

Following his church service, there was a military service at the cemetery. I had never seen an honor guard, so I was very moved and impressed by the respectful tribute for my grandfather.

My dad, carrying grandpa to the final resting place for his physical remains:

My cousin, an Iraq veteran, saluting grandpa:

Grandpa rarely spoke about the war. He was a humble, shy, and generous man. He believed in equality, peace, and integrity. This case also contains M&Ms - because what most of his grandchildren will remember is that grandpa had a sweet tooth and made the best milkshakes in the world - even for breakfast, if you asked him.

I was disappointed when my camera ran out of memory in the middle of the gun salute. This was the best I could do:

Halloween

My Dad scaring the trick-or-treators :

With Daddy:

You would think this house would have some good treats...

But no one was home.

The Pumpkin Carving Parties used to be much different before we all had kids.... Bon fires, beer, and bongo drums....

Now we have sippy cups and breast feeding! (And you won't hear any of us complaining.)

Home at Last

I picture it like this:

A mom in a warmly lit kitchen with the smell of something wonderful baking in the oven and her 4 boys standing around her, holding cups of steaming coffee or hot chocolate. They have some cheerful jazz playing in the background, but it is mostly unheard under the sound of the young men teasing their mother, hooting in laughter, as they tug her apron strings to have her join them in a card game at the kitchen table. Her two husbands, both who left her widowed before the end of her own long life, sit and read the newspaper, lounging in recliners by the fire with family afghans over their laps and contentment on their faces.

One of these husbands met her when she was only 12 – and he was 19. He was an aspiring preacher going off to seminary. In a romantic, and most likely impulsive spirit, she promised herself to him. Seven years later, when he was done with school, they reunited and married. She bore him 6 boys.

Years later, she was widowed.

When she fell in love again, her boys (now grown men) walked her down the aisle and sang to a crowded church of family and friends. Love had struck twice.

Years later, she was widowed again.

Now, with them all under one roof, only 2 things were missing. This past week, both walked in the door as they finally returned Home.

My grandpa and his last living brother joined their mom, dad, stepdad, and 4 brothers after both passed away this week.

I imagine it was a joyous reunion. There were hugs, tears, laughter, and the gentle teasing that always accompanies siblings. A mother had all of her boys under one roof again. I imagine our Creator smiling on the scene that He had set, rejoicing in His most beautiful and fulfilling creation – FAMILY.

In all the abundant love and joy that can be found in our sometimes chaotic earthly homes, it is astonishing and heartwarming to think that there are even better and brighter moments to be found when we pass from this, and enter our new Home that has been set and waiting for us before we were even born.

Greenbluff

Landslide

After a typical whirlwind trip to my hometown this past weekend, we were driving back across the state with the early fall mist in the air and the lush evergreens of the Cascades sprinkled with the honey gold, deep rust, and vibrant pumpkin shade of other species. Jagged and towering peaks drifted in and out of the clouds, as did our vehicle with 2 bouncing children and a golden mountain of dog.

As we drove, we were listening to the usual hodge-podge of tunes, but one song seemed to stand out above all others. (due to my state of mind.) It was "Landslide" by Stevie Nicks. As she sang about the "Seasons of my life..." I felt that it was the perfect serenade after my weekend back home.

I went home this weekend to see my grandpa before he dies.

He has entered the winter of his life after many productive years.

Last week doctors assumed it would be days until my grandpa passed away. A UTI, Pneumonia, and refusing to eat or drink had left him unresponsive. This weekend, when I entered his new nursing home, I found him trying to stand up. As the nurses hustled to settle him safely back in bed, I had a moment of indecision - a moment of contemplation. I had never been in that position before and wanted to get it right. How should I act? What should I say? What would he even understand? For the best or not, I quickly decided to operate under the old cliche that life really does travel in a circle. Since grandpa is circling back to where he started almost 90 years ago, born to a plucky young lady and her preacher husband (a lovely love story for another time), he is weak, dependent, looking for comfort, touch, and his basic needs. He is not so much "reduced," as he is remembering. He is remembering how it is to be out of control of his own life. He is remembering how it is to be an infant. And if we all do our jobs as his loved ones - This shouldn't be a negative experience.

Thinking of how I nurtured my own infants, I sat by his bed and started to rub his arms. When he said his feet ached, I rubbed his feet and watched his eyes close in contentment. I leaned forward to understand his garbled speech, reminded him of his own thoughts when he became lost in a sentence, and reassured him of his own goodness and his safety in this new environment. I repeated myself often, ran my hands over his bald head, and tucked his blankets under his chin whenever they slipped. Just as I did with my children, I spoke of love and memories without embarrassment, completely cured of my usual shyness in poignant situations. The rest of the world melted away as I mothered my own grandfather. When it was time to leave, I convinced him to close his eyes and take a nap. As I leaned forward to kiss his forehead, he told me, "Thank you very much" and he placed a hand on my cheek. I like to think that for the time I was with him, my grandpa's world was as warm and golden as a beloved child's'. It's just a matter of time, after all, before he will meet his own parents again, and his brothers who have gone before him. I believe our job is to make sure he is comfortable until the day of that delightful reunion.

So as we travel through all the seasons of our life, from the time when we rely on the love and nurture of others to survive, to the times when we must provide the same to our own children, and then circle back again, I think a great and powerful beauty can be found in the sphere. As long as we all recognize our own part to play in the giving and receiving, no season should be without peace and loveliness.

Cora Brynn

Another baby! And in a family made almost exclusively of males, my husband and his brother, Greg, have sent shock-waves through the generations by producing gorgeous little females. Addison has been joined by the lovely:

Cora Brynn

She arrived with a full head of dusky red hair and creamy skin. She already showed spunk and sass by making her parents wait an extra week and a half for her arrival. (poor Alisha!) I can't wait to get my hands on her again!

Getting out with the guys

Aside from drooling over the new baby, I was able to go on a little kayaking excursion with my dad and grandpa. What a great way to enjoy Eastern Washington! When I went to college in Seattle, most of my new friends were under the assumption that I came from a dry, desolate, and ugly wasteland. They couldn't be more wrong! Since I left for college 10 years ago, I've pined for the lakes, rivers, wooded trails, and green meadows of my home. Seattle may be surrounded by water, but the water around my hometown is much more approachable. :) No parking lots, boat ramp fees, or tourists. Just you, your family and friends, a cool drink, and a slow floating afternoon. You might see some moose, will definitely see some dragon flies, and may periodically need to be on the lookout for angry "canoe-tipping" beavers.

I remember running alongside the busy Seattle streets with a college teammate who was also from Eastern Washington. She and I decided that we had definitely needed to get away to sew our wild oats and all, but we would always be more at home in a town with dusty ditches to run along.